Is The Best Model Fictional Dad a Dog?

Stories that we tell say something about what we, collectively as a culture, believe about certain roles. And, while it was a while ago, June is the month of Father’s Day, so let me ruminate on fictional dads that I find to be decent fatherhood role models.

Because I am a dad. A grandad now. Which means I have thoughts on fatherhood (as does everyone else, I’ll concede). (Aside on images: All are publicity stills used in media, original sources are Disney, Pixar and Netflix. I don’t own any of the images.)

How well did I fulfill the role of father? That’s not for me to answer. And fatherhood is a role that we fall into--not always unexpectedly, but raising any child is a wondrous and scary and surprising adventure. I, for one, don’t think there’s just a one-size-fits-all answer to what makes for a good parent, anyway. After all, we’re complex sentient animals with big brains that complicate everything. What’s best for one dad- or parent-child pair does not always work at all for another

All dads muddle through, just as all moms do. The good news, I suppose, is that attitude makes a huge difference, and any parent who at least takes the role seriously and tries is likely, in the end, to do OK.

By the way, while men and women are not identical beings, I’m not one who believes the role of “dad” is always sex specific. So, for the many females out there fulfilling dad functions—good for you, and in commenting on fictional male fathers, I’m not trying to be exclusive to the XY genetic pattern.

Anyway, here are four fictional fathers of recent years who represent, to me, each some positive aspect of fatherhood:

Catherine Zeta-Jones as Morticia Addams, Luis Guzmán as Gomez Addams. Embarrassing their teen daughter with a PDA, as good parents ought to.

1-Gomez Addams from the Netflix series “Wednesday.” Spoilers coming, so back out now, if you need to.

The Addams Family is an interesting set of tales, starting as it did as a series of cartoons, spawning a 1960s TV series, movies both live and animated and now this streaming series. I’ve already noted that I am a fan of “Wednesday,” the Netflix contribution to this family of fables.

And I like the character Gomez and his latest incarnation. The Addams family is a Gothic tale with horror trappings, but it has a rather quaint sensibility, at the same time. The family itself is cartoonish—Wednesday, in all versions of the tale, is always on the verge of murdering her younger brother Pugsley. But there is a wink to the viewer, the violence here, even in the live-action versions, is cartoonish and not to be taken too seriously. Just as Wiley Coyote is never killed by going off the cliff holding an anvil, Pugsley survives electrocution, being buried alive, whatever. The violence isn’t “real.”

But the family dynamic is at least a real representation of how we think of family. In “Wednedsay,” Gomez tells Morticia that their Little Storm Cloud will never be alone. (In context, then sending a spy to watch over her isn’t an example of good parenting, but never mind.) Gomez is in love with his daughter, in a healthy, fatherly way, and that obvious love lands him on this honor roll of fictional father figures.

Not that the series, nor Gomez, is perfect. I’m not a lawyer, but some of the law in the series is very jumbled. For example, Wednesday digs up a grave to find a colored finger that proves the boy Gomez supposedly killed died of nightshade poisoning. Well, he didn’t really—he was stabbed as he was dying. Several issues here. Even if the boy had ingested a fatal dose of nightshade poison, stabbing him before the poison killed him is still a homicide. And digging up a grave does require a court order—even if it solved a crime, Wednesday and Morticia were both subject to charges for a serious offense. To me, the show is clearly not about the law—as law shows go, it’s pretty wackadoodle. And that hurts, a bit, in a show that is a basically a murder mystery. Still, it’s a live action cartoon, right? I don’t demand that a cartoon show adhere strictly to reality, and in this commentary, even more cartoonish shows are coming.

Agustín Madrigal, voiced by Wilmer Valderrama.

2) Augustin Madrigal from “Encanto.” First, he’s the sympathetic dad who understands Mirabel’s struggles more than anybody else. I also like that he has a good relationship with Julieta—the two are a team and both try to understand and support Mirabel. Unlike the next fictional relationship, mom and dad here are largely on the same page, which is a great family dynamic.

True, he also tries to hide things from Abuela—everyone in the family is afraid of her. But he also, in concert with Julieta, at least speaks up to Abuela in defense of Mirabel.

Jin Lee and Melin Lee, voiced by Orion Lee and Rosalie Chiang.

3) Jin Lee in “Turning Red.” The family dynamic isn’t quite as healthy here, and the father is a bit too much of a passive figure.

But he can understand his daughter’s emotions in a way that her mother doesn’t. The scene in which he finds the video of the friends and tells Melin that she can erase the tape if she wants to, but it made him laugh is an emotional highlight of the movie. Jin is able to appreciate and love his daughter’s “messy” side, something many parents struggle with.

And he’s also a 4-Townie. I think having the mental ability to “think young” without painfully trying to act young is a healthy thing. And it’s one reason Jin understand Melin so well.

In this fictional family, Jin also is the cook in the household—the trope in our fiction is often the father who can’t provide food for his family, who feeds them cereal when mom is not around. That’s a reality in some places and times—but I respect more a dad who recognizes the basic domestic skills--such as how to fix a meal, how to run the laundry, how the dishwasher functions--are part of a father’s role. A dad is a parent and should be competent in all parent things—changing a diaper, feeding a baby, washing the dishes and fixing meals in the first place. Yes, the traditional dad is a breadwinner and the traditional mom keeps the home, but the burden of domestic work needs to be shared, and no dad gets a pass for not knowing what most of the buttons on most of the home appliances do. So one reason I really respect Jin is that he know his way around the kitchen, as a good dad ought to know even if he’s not a chef.

Bandit. No actor listed, because, clearly, Dr. Heeler is a real archeologist.

4—Bandit in “Bluey.” Yes, I can imagine some of you objecting. “Bluey” is not a realistic show at all—Bandit is an archeologist who never seems to do a day of work. He’s relentlessly optimistic and clueless at the same time. The show does stereotype genders—Bandit Heeler is the carefree, fun parent while the mom, Chilli Heeler, is the sensible voice of reason. While those are stereotypes, that are also true personalities, and, in the improbable world of “Bluey," they ring true for me.

And there is something important and special in the playfulness of Bandit. He’s a character presumably who has a PhD but is quickly willing to imagine with his children at their level. That sense of play is sometime difficult for adults to achieve, but those who can suddenly turn a row of chairs into a bus, plane or train are, in my book, more effective fathers. Play isn’t something to look down on, it’s a lifelong habit that helps us mentally rehearse situations, imagine outcomes, enjoy interactions and create our own fictions.

As Wash says in “Firefly”: “This is a good land and we will call it ‘This Land.’” Not that our own fictions are always all that good nor complex (and there is the tragedy that the character Wash wasn’t a dad), but I think imagination, as long as it’s not narcistic or self-delusional, is a sign of a flexible mind that can stay mentally young.

So, Bandit is no more real than Wiley Coyote. Yet he does have something to say to us dads. Try never to ignore the fantasy lives of your children, and be the dragon or prince or ogre or pirate or captain that the situation demands. At heart, we are all a bit like Peter Pan. And the best dads are adults who can think like adults, but who also retain that portion of their minds that will never grow up.

Bandit comes last, because, in some ways, he’s the best. And his message is simple, but very important. While a parent—a dad—needs to think and act like an adult, they also still need the capacity to think imaginatively and creatively, as a child thinks.

Play with your daughters. And your sons. Never grow up so much that you’re too grown up for that.

Will Netflix ‘Wedneday’ Avoid ‘Penguins’ Sydrome?

 

If you haven’t seen the Netflix show “Wednesday” and plan to, you may want to move along, citizen. There will be spoilers here. I also discuss “Inside Out” and “Penguins of Madagascar,” but I would plead that not only has the expiration date on spoilers for those long passed, I also won’t get into the details of those plots anyway, which is easy in the “Penguins” case because there are no details of the plot to get into. Anyway: Official “Wednesday” spoiler warning issued. Now, on with the show.

There is a condition that sometimes has an impact on children’s movies in recent years; I call it “Penguins of Madagascar” syndrome.

If you haven’t seen “Penguins,” I urge you not to bother. The wisecracking swimming dinosaur protagonists of this tale have amusing things to say and engage in many slick action sequences. And that’s it. And that’s the problem. There is no character development, because there aren’t really any characters beyond surface personalities. The movie is all flash and dash with no heart.

The best entertainment, particularly “family” entertainment, has levels. Think of the Pixar franchise. There are long arguments to be found online about how realistic the psychology of “Inside Out” is because the underlying precepts of the film are debated by psychologists. Which means some don’t care for the emotional functions as presented in the film, while many people do find them insightful.

As for me, I’m a fan. If “Inside Out” isn’t a text in psychology, at least there is evidence that the people who wrote it have read a psychology text—it’s a family film that has layers. Sure, anger may present masculine stereotypes—even a good film can have flaws that people can legitimately complain about.

Nobody worries about the layers in “Penguins of Madagascar.” It doesn’t have any.

Now, I know the recent Netflix series “Wednesday” is not in the same entertainment universe as “Penguins” or “Inside.” Shame on any parent who lets young children view this series—it’s too brutal, too bloody, too violent, in my opinion, for most pre-tween eyes.

But for those of us who are either beyond our first decade of life experience, or whose teen years were long ago in the ABBA era, I endorse “Wednesday.” I like it.

It’s not a flawless show. I wish, for example, that Enid Sinclair, an amusing sidekick, had been given a bit more intelligent things to say. I was OK with a former Wednesday ending up on the dark side, but not so OK with the exit of Principal Weems, a character who would have been delicious to keep around for another season.

Larissa Weems played by Gwendoline Christie. Netflix publicity image.

It was sort of like seeing Principal Snyder die in Season 3 of “Buffy the Vampire Slayer.” Then again, in Buffy, the characters were going to move out of high school at that point anyway, and it would have required improbable backflips to bring Snyder to UC-Sunnydale, so maybe he was expendable at that point, from a story-telling point of view.

Not so Weems. One expects that season two of “Wednesday” will be set at Nevermore Academy, a place that will miss its literal giant of a principal.

Still, I found much to like in “Wednesday.” I was not as disturbed by the appearance of her father, who is plumper and frumpier than the smooth movie Gomez. I recall the original Addams Family cartoons, and as many have pointed out, this streaming-service Gomez is true to the original. Also, I don’t mind a character shifting a bit from one interaction of an ongoing franchise to the next—and in this latest version, I found Wednesday’s dad to be an endearing, caring father. Indeed, despite the Goth trappings and dark humor, one thing that makes the Addams Family franchise work is that they really seem to be a family.

Three of the Netflix Addams family characters: Gomez Addams (Luis Guzmán), Wedneday Addams (Jenna Ortega) and Morticia Addams (Catherine Zeta-Jones). A great cast helps make this show work. Netflix publicity image.

And young Jenna Ortega—she has gotten lots of praise for her starring role. She is a delicious Wednesday with her stiff mannerisms, death stare, quick one-liners and, now and then, evil smile. Ortega has arrived.

Which might be unfortunate for Ortega as a human. Hollywood is not kind to its young talent. It can make a starlet fabulously famous for a time, but often leaves them with severe life troubles. It’s not always good to be a multi-millionaire so young.

To be fair, in the few interviews I’ve seen her in, Ortega seems intelligent, quick witted and sharp-tongued. And she was a child star who has found a niche as a young adult—a sometimes rare trick. Perhaps she has her head screwed on tight enough and can navigate the temptations and burdens of entertainment fame. She surely knows far more about that world and its pitfalls than I do.

And I’ve segued from writing about a role—Wednesday—to writing about the actor playing that role. It’s a common mistake, and I want to be clear that Jenna Ortega is not Wednesday Addams, she merely plays her in a streaming video series.

Anyway, I know Ortega was already a successful Hollywood figure before this Netflix show, although I’ve not enjoyed seeing her before. “Wednesday” has surely, if briefly, pushed her from the role of successful actor to a top-tier A lister.

From Wikimedia Commons, based on a screen shot from a YouTube video, Jenna Ortega.

Although there are many complications that sudden superstardom has brought to Ortega:

• A minor tiff with writers during their strike. Ortega noted that she was “unprofessional” and insisted on changing some lines. Writers, grappling with a changing landscape, the onset of AI and long being under-rewarded in Hollywood anyway, did not react well. I hope Ortega recalls that, like all stars, she is dependent on smart writing as well as her own personal talents.

• Speculation about her sexuality. She is a physically beautiful, physically small and very young adult Hollywood female star. On screen, her character in Wednesday stipulates that she will never marry nor have a family. Is Ortega straight? Gay? Bi? Frankly, why does anybody outside of her close friends and family care? She’s 20 years old. It would be nice to give her time and room to figure it all out without a media glare on her private life, although, sadly, that is not the nature of our media. And those who seek the spotlight often find it to be a very hot place to exist.

• The smoking thing. Paparazzi recently caught Ortega lighting a cigarette, and much was made of her mother, a nurse, posting anti-smoking messages on social media after that. Well, I do hope Ortega quits if she has started smoking and does not make it a habit if it’s not one yet.

This one, the smoking thing, feels a little different, to me. Anybody who has  become a star has some responsibility to live a responsible life. So, a minor wag of a digit at Ortega for putting herself in an awkward place vis a vis a deadly habit.

Sure, what she did is legal. Anybody is allowed to do it. And I can see the point of, again, giving her some space. Yet, I do not want any of my young grandchildren to think smoking is cool because a smoking hot young superstar is puffing away.

Maybe she is dealing with stress—smoking is often a habit that arises in stressful situations. The old WWII saying was “smoke ’em if you’ve got ’em.” Wasn’t a good idea for young GIs and isn’t a great idea for a Hollywood star, either.

But it’s not Ortega’s fault that people may idolize her. She is an immature human, living a complicated life as all of us do. As a human, she seems packed with talent, which she displayed in season 1 of “Wednesday.” I’m a fan. And it’s great to see a Latina icon, something not common in our media.

Anyway, where did the Penguins go? Here they come again. Previous Addams Family franchises have a mixed record. I’m not going to comment on the 1960s TV show, although I am old enough to vaguely recall it a bit. I don’t think I was a regular viewer.

As for the 1990s movies, well. Movie 1 and movie 2 are great. Movie 3 had a change in cast and fell victim to Penguin syndrome—the writing was tired and trite and the results pretty bad.

And the recent animated movies follow a similar pattern. The 2019 “The Addams Family” featured, surprise, Wednesday Addams as arguably it’s most important character as the family battled a cable TV show host seeking country-club perfection in a planned town. It is an amusing movie, partly because it’s a dig at HGTV sensibilities. But the 2021 follow-up “The Addams Family 2” makes little sense, is full of action meaning nothing and mostly goes nowhere. Like a penguin.

The live action movie series managed two good installments before stumbling in the third. In the cartoon world, there was one amusing tale followed by a lame one.

I have some hopes for our current “Wednesday.” May the creators, writers, director, talented cast, continue to push story—to have something to share that has some wit and depth. May they not pursue the one-liners so hard that they subsume what every good tale needs—a tale.

And I wish Jenna Ortega well. Good luck, kid. You already know this, but in Hollywood, you need it.